Whose Got My Vote?

I can't vote for Barack Obama. The reason is because of my dog, Penny. She's a pug. She is quite adorable, sometimes overly affectionate, and incredibly friendly. Especially to new people. If an unfamiliar person stops by for a visit, Penny will not leave them alone until she has received a minimum of 10 minutes of uninterrupted love and affection from them.

Unfortunately, Penny is a racist. But not in the way you might think. For you see, Penny hates African-Americans, but only when they are on the television.

Penny has been around black people before. Young and old, men and women, cute and ugly; and she has no problem. In fact, I would go so far as to call her "color-blind" when it comes to people in flesh and bone in front of her.

But once an African-American comes on the television, she goes nuts. So, during the presidential debate last night, we got to hear- quite pleasantly, in fact- all of John McCain's promises, speeches, and attacks nice and clear. Some made sense. Some reminded me why I wanted him to be the candidate instead of "W" over eight years ago. Still, I would have liked to hear what his opponent for the evening had to say.

Unfortunately, I couldn't hear it over my dog's hate-filled barks and nips. It was uncomfortable, to say the least; to see a dog you raised- and tried to raise right- from a mere puppy behaving in such a disgusting manner was just heart-breaking. And kind of funny. Until my wife said, "Looks like we might be in for another four years of this."

No way.

So unfortunately, I cannot vote for Barack Obama. Because of my dog. The racist pug.

But that doesn't mean I'm voting for McCain either. Who am I voting for? I'll explain it all next blog.

That's called a teaser,

Adam "The 'House" Woolhouse